CATHastrophic Mediocrity

I dropped by in my friends’ apartment this morning before i went to school. I just felt that i have to be there and see my friends. My world seems to revolve around them keeping me company in whatever i go through in my life. It just surprised me that these boys I’m spending my time with is really sensitive to what i feel. Although i try to suppress certain emotions, they can tell that i’m hurting and i’m keeping a secret from them.

There are times i just pretend that i’m alright when in fact, i’m not. And i’m surprised that they know it even if i don’t tell. They know me inside out. They can tell by the way i look at them, and there are only a few people in the world who knows me that well.

A lot of people tell that Men are from Mars, and Women are from Venus. But not in my case. I love my guys. because they are the persons who helped me find my self, when i lost it………..

Another to week of ups and downs. Yeah! I left home early this morning. Mom and Dad left for the province at seven today. It’s so ironic. We haven’t seen daylight in the province since we visited our relatives there two or three years ago. I hate the feeling that the main reason why they went is to borrow a couple of thousands just to get us through this week. <SIGH!>

Lola had been so anxious to see us, but i think she’ll welcome my parents with a sigh. Your children, coming back to your front step just to borrow some bucks!!! Life sucks!!!!

And here comes a friend telling me, he haven’t slept the whole night just to finish his coding thing, only to find out he had nothing to eat for breakfast. <SOB!>

Enough of pity.. I don’t want to be pitied!!! Darned!!!!!

last friday, i shot up an argument with one of my barkada. I was just infuriated with his behavior that i started acting so pissed off of his behavior. After i did everything for them to give them what they want, he had been somewhat ingrateful. The sweet Catherine I was the whole day turned out to be the next dragon Hercules will surely be challenged to try in battle.

But quite to my surprise, my former boyfriend who happens to be one of my guy friends in the group seemed to know what’s going on inside my head. He seemed to know that my mood’s starting to change. Eventhough I tried to keep my temper at bay, he seemed to know that I’m trying to suppress my emotions. Does he really know me that well?

We broke up almost two years ago,and we haven’t talk about it after one year. But the length of time we had been friends after that thing between us is still considered too short for him to know me inside out. He acts as if he knows every piece of me. What does that supposed to mean?

almost fifteen minutes ago, i had an Ethics in Journalism Seminar with my fellow colleagues in the campus journalism field. April, Pink, Jeanette and even Mr. Ex were there to accompany me in the activity. 

We had the usual talk about writing the editorial. And i again heard the one-year old line "ilabay sa Bankerohan River". Famous line  of Dr. Macario Tiu, the former Editor-in-Chief of the Tambara, and a current editor of the Dagmay, which aims to make Davao a literary center of the Philippines. We were made to understand what our roles as campus journalists are. He also had that "slash and burn" concept. I do hope that I’ll try that practice when I’ll be writing my drafts.

Anyway, we were made to watch an old film. If i heard Pink right, it’s the StarShip Cruiser or whatever thhe title is. We waited for a good hour before our speaker finally came. The start was really a bore. In the next minute, I found  myself scribbling nonsense in my notebook. But in the later part, we were made to raise our questions about ethics and that started the ball rolling.

There were a lot of questions particularly about the freedom of expression of the students being somewhat suppressed by the higher-ups. Reactions and concerns on that matter started to shoot out from nowhere. Until finally, someone stood up to propose to the body to come up with a common code of ethics that willll protect the interests of both students and the adminstration.

I’m looking forward that the legislative board of the students will find a way to address this concern. House Speaker John Silvosa had also raised that a resolution will be raised to the legislative by our representative.

I’ve been a trying-hard writer for almost 10 years, working in the different school publications since fourth grade. At a young age, I had seen that freedom of expression is limited to certain norms to protect the name of the institution.

All i can say is that every journalist should be responsible and accountable to have an "accurate presentation of balanced facts". Follow the code of ethics. Journalism calls for "gracious courtesy but unclenching courage".