Sacred Secrecy..
I’ve been tired of the same things. And I must admit, I don’t even know where I’m heading. I try to find the answers which to others may seem so obvious. But the answers they know are not at all the answers I need. I maybe speaking in metaphors. And no body would even care to read this the second time around - trying to decipher what I mean.
I am not at all at ease when everyone’s watching my move. I am not some celebrity that everybody should talk about. I want to keep my life private - far from the judgment of many. The freedom I want is not at all the freedom that I have.
Some may say I am a fool for some reason, or someone that is far beyond anyone’s grasp. I am not a laboratory rat that everyone should examine through a transparent glass case. I might be hurting some people because of my mistakes. And there are also truths that I should suppress. And I am a bit strangled by this kind of dilemma. That I have to be someone else I am not.
When should I say the truth, and be who I want myself to be when someone might get hurt of that truth? Yeah! The truth can set us free. Easily said than done. I am not at all me.
Maybe that’s the way life is. Everybody in secrecy - something held sacred, and very personal, oblivious to the world, oblivious to the people, even to those who mean so much to you. Everything has to keep secrecy as sacred - withheld from disclosure - to keep things in place, to avoid confusion, to protect. Truths unsaid, feelings unexpressed.
ok rah nah teh..emote pud lagi au tong isa sa ia blog..basa2 lang ko..may gani kahinumdom pa ko..heheh..nakavisit nako after 48 years..heheh..
Comment by march — August 11, 2008 @ 7:33 am